Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
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