saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
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drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
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I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.