My dad just sent me a text telling me to "say hi to all the luscious bitches" at the gay bar. Guess this explains my childhood
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize