your parents love me but you hate me
super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
Randomize
