My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
Well the nurse forgot to take all my stitches out, so my surgical tools are peroxide, kitchen scissors, fingernail clippers, a pocket knife, and 11 beers. Let's do this...
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
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