Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
if i dont get laid while im dressed as Tim Tebow, i'm just staying true to the costume.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
I'm actually kind of scared about the prospect of us living together. We're just going to eat pizza and drink wine before retiring to our rooms with vibrators
Nothing has ever been more true. Ever.
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
Randomize
