so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
Guess the answer to the last 2 texts right and you'll get a boob shot tonight. Guess wrong and it will be a picture of a used, boogery kleenex.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
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