My roommate and I had a nyquil contest. The nyquil won.
i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
Randomize