i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
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