Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
Randomize
