I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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