The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
Her car is covered in frozen vomit, and she lost her iPhone. I'm also pretty sure I smoked crack last night. Rest in peace 2014.
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
God, I missed his penis.
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