yeah so this exboyfriend of yours reckons you're still together and he punched me in the face cos i slept with you last week. you might wanna have a word with him or at a minimum change your facebook status.
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
Randomize
