I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
sitting in a shitty karaoke bar playing pokemon go and drinking a mimosa. how is your sunday night
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
Randomize
