So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
The drugstore has summer clearance. I bought you a little mermaid bucket. Now your hangovers will feel more like childhood adventures.
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
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