remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
Look on the bright side, one day you will get to tell your grandkids how grandpappy got roofied on his 21st and woke up in a for sale house missing his shoes
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
Let's get this straight. I am six fucking feet tall. Do you even understand how limited my options in guys to date are? No. Did you see my last three boyfriends? I looked like a fucking giant next to them. So I will fuck this six-foot-seven Italian model even if I am the ugliest girl at this party because, goddammit, I deserve to.
Randomize
