PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
Nothing motivates a person to clean their apartment like puking up cheese ravioli beer-tequila chicken wings for eight hours.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
I left myself a note saying 'buy a hamster but not an orange one like this pen'
omg so drunk
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
Just found the measuring tape in my bathroom. How drunk could I have possibly been on Saturday?!
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
that is very illegal...i love you.
Randomize
