How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
Great parenting moment: noticing your kid is going to puke from gorging fish sticks and sending her outside. Then watching her puke on your dog.
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
Randomize
