Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
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