No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
You’re a genius! I just walked in, shut the door, blew him and left. He could barely move afterwards and was a hot mess at the presentation. He already sent me a calendar invite for another meeting
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Randomize
