dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
Randomize