That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
