Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
Randomize
