why didn't you poke me back
capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
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