great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
Randomize
