Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
Found a waterbottle filled with a bloody mary in my purse this morning. Blacked-out me is always trying to help hungover me, it's so cute.
I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
How was I supposed to know she would get offended when I asked her how long it took to draw on her eyebrows.
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
all i tweeted was "emergency this is not a drill" and he immediately texted me asking if this was a subtle booty call…it was
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
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