just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
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