you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
Randomize
