ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
I need like a hormone stopper. Or a chastity belt. Or like a lady business alarm that goes off when I'm being too drunk.
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
Randomize
