yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
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