i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
I was not drunk enough for that final.
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
Randomize
