Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
SHE JUST SHOVED MY HAND DOWN HER PANTS AT THE BAR
Don't text me with that hand
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
Randomize
