Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
Randomize