new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
Randomize