Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
My phone now changes "me" to "mrrrrrrrrh", thank you new years.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
Randomize