The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
What do I have to do to get you laid? I talked to that girl with the ugly dog for 45 minutes trying to get you in, and all you said was "Steven Spielberg is my favorite director."
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
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