I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
I’m inviting a few of my favorite manwhores to a pool party. Bring booze and wear your banana hammock so Amy can see what I’m always talking about
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