Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
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