I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
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