Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
Moan for me like Helen Keller
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
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