Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
Randomize