He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
being pregnant is like rehab
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
Randomize
