Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
Randomize