worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
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