porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
Randomize
