I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
why did i make a hit list last night containing only McDonalds?
you tried to order a magarita mcflurry and when they said they didnt make those you tried to call 911
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
Randomize
