You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
Randomize
