I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
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