yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
Randomize