She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
Randomize
