small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
I just found little boats floating in my bathtub....they are made out of white castle boxes, condoms, pickles, and corks. All the wine we bought is being used as the "ocean"....clearly we didn't drink any of the wine.....but I don't remember doing this.
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
Public service announcement: if you would like to continue receiving blow jobs, a 25% increase in fuck-giving will be expected immediately, and you're expected to give an actual flying fuck at least once a week. Brought to you by the ad council.
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
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