Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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